Mars Slim is Ridiculous

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Who can take a Mars Bar, and slim it into two?

Pretty much anyone I’d say.  Despite the epic Rocky-Horror-Picture-Show-esque musical nature of this ridiculous commercial, I simply cannot abide by the apparently transparent manipulation happening here.  When you take any particularly fattening food product, make it smaller and call it slim, there’s really no other way to see it, but that you’re trying to make people think the new version is healthier.

However, a chocolate bar, is a chocolate bar, is a chocolate bar.  Am I wrong?  There is no other difference between this new incarnation of a milk chocolate covered hunk of creamy nougat and caramel, and its older brother – the full sized Mars bar.  The fact that they cut it in half and put two of them together, means that there’s just as many ass-widening calories in the Mars Slim as any other chocolate bar.  Anyone who would be fooled into thinking, even subconsciously, that Mars Slim is somehow less decadent than the original, needs to open their eyes a little.  And even as I type this, I know that there are people out there using this little bit of marketing word play to justify their own dirty little habit.

What I say to that is: people, if you want a damn Mars bar, have a damn Mars bar…don’t pussyfoot around, trying to fool yourself and everyone around you into thinking that a Mars Slim is a healthier choice.  In fact, if your going to indulge, why on earth would you chose the smaller version over the real thing.



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